Thursday, November 12, 2009

thank you

Have you ever noticed that when you compliment a young child on how smart they are, how cute they look or even their big muscles are, that the response they give back is always, Thank You.

I was at a retreat last weekend and there was a beautiful woman in our group who was wearing beautiful earings. Another woman who she had just met said to her, "those earings are beautiful, I love the color and the way they look against your skin." The woman responded with, "oh, yeah, they kind of hurt my ears and they are old."

Can you imagine complimenting a 5 year old on how strong he is only for him to respond "well, I'm not really, actually I'm really weak and my clothes don't really fit me either." It's ridiculous, they will more likely respond, " Thanks! Do you want to see just how big my muscles are? I bet I could lift this whole table!"

This has been something I have been thinking about for a long time. I went to visit my dearest friend in California this past June and when I went into her home I was amazed by how beautiful it was. Of course I complimented her on it and instead of her saying, "yeah well, it's alright, there is still so much work to do on it" She said, "Thanks".

She and my children have taught me a lot about accepting a compliment with a good solid Thank You. When you compliment someone on something it is like a gift and to have them brush it off or throw it back, well, it's like saying, I don't want your gift. There is also a shift in energy within one self when we accept a compliment, something that assists us in standing a little taller and not shrinking like a flower desperate for water.

So the next time someone says how beautiful you are, or what a great mother you are or even how strong you are (because you know that you are), instead of dismissing what others see in you, invite that compliment in. You are worth it.


Wondering what my son's shirt says? "Love Hoo You Are" I bought it on etsy for him for Valentines this year.


Melodie said...

This is so true. I remember learning this in high school. That's when it sunk in anyway. I may have been taught earlier, I don't know, but I learned regardless of my own level of self-esteem involved, all I needed to say to a compliment was thank you. And I have done it ever since. It actually increases your self-esteem when you do it too!

Hobo Mama said...

The woman's response to the earring compliment is too funny, and true. Thanks for the reminder to accept graciously.